So.... I had to get an oil change. Getting it changed today meant I was still within the 3 month time period but a couple of thousand miles over that 3500 recommendation; I drove from Tennessee to Arkansas and back several times in the last three months, oh, and to Louisiana twice. Fortunately, there is one of those ten minute oil change places here in Arkadelphia, and it's the kind where you sit in the car while they change the oil. I think the customer sitting in the car makes the oil changers work faster; therefore, I prefer sit-in-the-car oil changes.
I feel a little like an airline pilot when I pull into these places because the attendant will wave you over with little hand signals and guide you into the bay (so you don't drive your car down into the pit). So apparently, there is also a hand signal for pop the hood which the attendant had to repeat a few times before I realized what he wanted me to do. Actually, there was a little scowl and a slight raising of his eyebrows the last time he motioned. I felt a little embarrassed at first, but then realized he should feel embarrassed because I had my window down the whole time - he could have just said, "pop the hood."
The girl who works the cash register came over to ask me what kind of oil I wanted. Dumbfounded by this question, I smiled, giggled, and replied "Car Oil?" She promptly reached inside the car, pulled the plastic-cling sticker from the windshield, then informed the attendant what type of "Car Oil" I wanted. After working under the hood, the attendant checked the air pressure of the tires. Almost scolding, he said, "that air pressure is awfully low." I commented, "well, that's why I brought it to you guys. Fill 'em up!" I wanted to tell him to put some "Tire Air" in there.
Now the one thing I know is that even if you stopped in the parking lot of the oil change place and replaced the air filter yourself right before pulling into the bay, they will still tell you that your air filter looks pretty dirty and it needs to be changed, otherwise, the gas mileage will decrease, the air conditioner will fail, the check engine light will come on, the radio will stop working, and the air bags will deploy when you turn on your blinkers. My favorite thing to tell them is that "It's okay. I like dirty air filters."
I have never claimed to be mechanically inclined or even a driving enthusiast, and I fully recognize that I am "automotively" inept - that's why I was at the oil change place and not doing it myself. However, I have been called a wonderful cook (I'm really just a mediocre cook - it's all in the presentation). And I absolutely know for sure that I would never saute anything in 5W/30.